Taking Criticism

One of the hardest things to do in any job is to take criticism. Sometimes, that criticism is persecution for being Christian, for being different than everyone else. Jesus tells us to expect this because he was persecuted for being different. Other times, criticism focus on job-related tasks or performance. When the criticism is undeserved, we feel cheated or disrespected. Even when the criticism is deserved, we may feel embarassed or angry about the attention. Two key parts of my job as a professor are teaching and research, and both subject me to criticism. It's almost impossible to please all the students in a class while still maintaining rigor. Student evaluations at the end of the year, even good ones, rarely indicate perfect scores. There's always something. Part of publishing academic research is listening to feedback from peers, feedback that always includes criticism and may often involve substantial rejects. Whatever your job, you can be sure that you'll face criticism at some point.

If you face criticism in your job, take these steps. First, remember that Jesus was perfect but he was still criticized. He knows what you're going through. Second, remember that God's opinion is the only one that counts. Work to please Him. Third, if you've done something wrong or below standards, fix it. Remember to work as if working for God. Be honest with yourself. Could your work have been better? Fourth, regardless of whether the criticism is deserved or not, do your best to not respond in anger or defensiveness. Think back to the first two steps. Jesus was criticized also and God's opinion is all that counts. Finally, use that as an opportunity to think about how you communicate with others. How often do you criticize others? When you do so, is it constructive. And does it come across as constructive?

You Have Heard It Said...

Matthew 5:21-26

As part of the Beautitudes, Jesus discusses a number of ideas about general living. In verse 21 and following, Jesus addresses the idea that murder is unacceptable. True, He says, but hating someone is just as bad. Jesus comes down pretty hard on people just for being angry and for calling someone a fool. He says that resolving a conflict is more important than even worship.

"If you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift."

Then Jesus has more instructions for conflicts: settle before things get serious. Paul says something very similar about taking care of anger. It doesn't always matter who's "right." You may find yourself on the wrong side, even if you think you're right.

Now think about your workplace. Have you had any conflicts recently? Remember, it doesn't matter whether you were right or not. Settle it quickly, even if it means you don't get what you think you deserve. Are you angry with someone at work? Don't dwell on it, and be careful about what you call the other person. It's not that it's necessarily wrong to be miffed at someone else. But what do you do next? Do you dwell on it, imagine getting back at the person, sabotage his or her work, and be generally disagreeable? Or do you talk to him or her, forgive (even if the other person doesn't apologize), and give the situation to God?

New Attitude, New Self, Created to be like God, Part 1

Ephesians 4:25-32

This passage has a great deal to say about holy living, so much so that I'm going to break it up over a few posts. The passage starts with "therefore," and a preacher friend of mine used to say that whenever you see "therefore," you have to look at what came "before." In verses 22-24, Paul says, "You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." With the idea of a new attitude and a new self, both of which were created to be like God, Paul describes several ways in which the new self is different from the old self. These are general living verses, but several are very applicable to workplaces as well.

Paul begins by encouraging the Ephesians to be truthful (see also Col. 3:8-14). I can't think of very many things that will erode your relationships faster at work (or anywhere else) than dishonesty. We're not necessarily talking about Enron-sized dishonesty (although that's included, too). I know when I'm just about caught up on everything and someone asks me if I have a minute to do a particular task, it's very tempting to say, "no, I'm just swamped right now." Or what about being behind on a project, but when the boss asks how it's going, saying, "fine, almost finished with it." There are any number of times when we may have the opportunity to tell a "white lie." But in this passage and in Colossians, Paul reminds us that we are called to be different from people around us.

Paul also calls us to be careful with our anger. Many people have heard the phrase "don't let the sun go down on your anger." This doesn't mean that you can't take a short time to cool off before dealing with a problem. What Paul is saying is don't let things fester. When someone really makes me mad, my natural inclination is to stew. Sure I may be nice to the person's face, but inside, I'm thinking about how I'm going to get back at them or I'm imagining bad things happening to them. So what happens after that? Are things better? Typically not. In fact, what usually happens is I'm tenser, more upset, but they are usually oblivious to my distress. I lose out on sleep and peace because I'm dwelling on what they did and what I'd like to see happen to them rather than spending time thinking about better things. If you're angry (for the right reasons), be angry. But don't dwell on it. Say something, don't say something, but either way, move on.